A friend posted a quote. It was about being responsible for the choices we make. But the way it was worded, it was too dismissive of circumstances and experiences. I'm not going to repeat the quote, but my reply was:
Yes, we are responsible for our choices, I agree. But our choices interrelate with things we didn't choose. And this text on the graphic ignores the strong impact on our lives of the things we didn't choose. It doesn't say we can overcome difficulties. It just brushes everything that's not choice aside like it doesn't matter.
But it reminded me of another quote I heard years ago. Which I had to seek out so I could quote it.
"We are not responsible for how we came to be who we are as adults but as adults we are responsible for whom we have become and for everything we say and do." Dr. Joseph Santoro.
In my own words: You aren't responsible for the bad things that happened to you. You aren't responsible for things you didn't learn, or wrong things you learned growing up. But you, as an adult, are responsible now for learning and growing, for becoming the best you that you can be. Continually challenging yourself. And trying your best to make good choices.
And the context of where I encountered that quote was definitely talking about self-improvement, not an expectation of instantly doing everything right.
Yeah, I believe in being responsible for our choices. But let's recognize, in ourselves and others, the things that affect who we are, as well as the things that continue to limit us.
